haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
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