Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize