So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
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