yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Randomize
