Have you finally orgasmed yet?
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
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