they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Still dying that you shit outside
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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