I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
PS: I just woke up from my shower
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Randomize
