Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Randomize
