Just cropdusted the office
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
