is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole