i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize
