Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
