Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
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I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize