thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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