I'm really into asian looking animals
So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
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He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
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I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.