covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
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