if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Randomize
