dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
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