Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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