yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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