we have officially lost it.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
Randomize
