She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Randomize
