Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things ππ
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
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