Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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