what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize
