3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
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