puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
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