i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
