He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
