His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
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