There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
A+ Viking dick
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Randomize