I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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