i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
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