well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
