So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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