watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
everyone is single if you try hard enough
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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