If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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