I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize