No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
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