i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Randomize
