the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
Randomize
