As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
The struggles of a small town man whore
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
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