The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
