we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
