No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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