Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
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