I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
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