come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
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