That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
ttyl tear gas
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
