I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
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