I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
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